Most of us have probably heard that our adverse childhood experiences inform our romantic relationships...but what about our work relationships? And what really constitutes an adverse childhood experience to begin with?
Unfortunately, there is a misconception that childhood traumas must be severe in order to impact us later on in life. But it’s not just experiences such as emotional abuse, physical abuse or addiction that can leave a lasting impact. Did your parents ever force you to give hugs to strangers, even if you didn’t really want to? Did they put on a perfect front in public, even when things were falling apart behind the scenes? Did they ever read your diary without your permission? All of these experiences are traumatic and have likely shaped your behaviors in adulthood without you even realizing it!
Join Rosanna Gill on this week’s episode of Breaking Labels for a conversation about how our upbringing fundamentally shapes the jobs we are drawn to and the experiences we have in the workplace. Learn about expectation hangovers, establishing boundaries, and why “Girl, stop apologizing” is lackluster advice if you haven’t discovered the root of why you’re doing it.
Quotes
• "There is so much information about the cycles that we perpetuate in our romantic relationships….But what I don’t think is talked about nearly as much and affects quite a big portion of our lives is our work relationships and the jobs that we’re drawn to, the roles that we’re drawn to and the way we show up in those roles and whether or not we feel empowered to set boundaries.” (4:57-5:47)
• “Children are pretty amazing in that they learn, they adapt, to do what they know is going to keep them safe. So if that means not acknowledging their own needs for the sake of keeping up a good front, then they will, just like their parents have done.” (7:35-7:54)
• “What boundaries [is your child] empowered to have if you as an adult, as their parent, as their authority figure, remove that from them?....Are you so surprised that they would have difficulty setting boundaries as an adult when they were told that their boundaries did not matter?” (12:17-12:38)
• “For me personally, not knowing why I was having such a hard time setting standards, not knowing what the root issue was, meant that I would read something like that, be super inspired...and then when I didn’t follow through, oh, how hard I would beat myself up.” (22:48-23:05)
• “If you don’t root out the emotional aspect of it, if you don’t get to that, if you don’t work on that, then the behavioral change really doesn’t matter. It’s just sticking a band-aid on a gash. It might cover up a little part of it, but that band-aid, it can’t hold a candle to the gash.” (29:55-30:12)
• “We are just as drawn to the professional situations that reflect our adverse childhood experiences as we are the romantic ones.” (32:18-32:22)
Links
Connect with host Rosanna Gill and Breaking Labels:
• https://www.instagram.com/breakinglabelspodcast/
• https://breakinglabelspodcast.com/
• https://www.instagram.com/rosanna.e.gill/
Rosanna is now offering a 12-week coaching program focused on helping YOU craft positive narratives for long-lasting transformation. If you are interested in learning more, you can reach out to Rosanna via email at rosanna@breakinglabelspodcast.com.
Schedule a consultation for aligners with Candid and get $250 off your aligners: http://cnd.co/v/rosanna_2
Podcast production and show notes provided by FIRESIDE Marketing